Monday, December 8, 2008

Where are you, Christmas?

It's finally starting to feel like Christmas to me. Not because people have turned their homes into colorful light displays, not because we've finally had a snowstorm (even though it didn't even stick), not because I'm sitting here watching the Charlie Brown Christmas Special, but because I have given my first Christmas gift of the season. It wasn't anything fancy--just a Christmas tree-scented candle for my friend whose favorite holiday is Christmas. He really wanted a tree but felt he doesn't have enough money for it this year. So then he wanted a tree-scented candle so he'd at least have the scent of the tree to provide some Christmas spirit, but felt like he couldn't even afford that. So I decided to take care of him.

Isn't giving what Christmas is all about? We celebrate the gift of something simple--a baby, whose life and death gave us something we cannot buy or earn for ourselves--hope and salvation.

So, if you have yet to find some Christmas spirit I suggest you try giving it to someone else. If you give, it will come.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Three Cheers

...for Payless Shoe Source, that is. This weekend I found a pair of shoes in the top of my closet. Apparently, I bought them last fall and never wore them. They still had the tags on and the receipt (dated 10/22/07) in the box. Funny thing about this receipt--no return policy! So I thought I'd take my chances and stop by my local Payless while I was out and about. To make a long story short--they gave me a full refund! How great is that?!

Monday, September 22, 2008

Allow me to indulge... a moment of much-needed venting.

It's a fact of my life--I am short. I know that I'm short, I've always been short and I will always be short. I have been painfully aware of this fact for the majority of my 29+ years so I don't need anyone to remind me, point it out, tease about or rub in it, thank you very much. I certainly don't need you to state that fact in almost daily interactions, much less to say it as if I were a freak of nature or if there were something wrong with being short--because there's not, damn it! I could tease other people for being freakishly tall, or too skinny, or bald or flat-chested, but I don't. You know why? 'Cuz I know they can't change it--and it's not nice! I would like to state, for the record, that I am not a midget, so don't dare call me one. I am not a little person, handicapped, disabled, have a genetic oddity or am in any way deserving of ridicule or of being treated differently in any way. And please don't try to write off good things like my being more flexible or having a perfect center of balance to the fact that I am short. It's called I've been practising Yoga for at least an hour a week for over a year and anyone else who did the same would have great flexibility and balance, too! Honestly, sometimes I just wanna throttle people.

So, to all my family, friends and co-workers who appreciate me for who I am and not for my height or lack thereof--thank you. I feel slightly better now.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Who Knew?

You Are Pocahantas!

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Free-spirited and wise. You have a strong passionate spirit that touches and changes all who know you. The wisdom and common sense that you have is really what guides you through life. Even so, you also have a very playful side that loves adventure and excitement.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Quirk Tag

I have been tagged by Kelsey

Link the person who tagged you. Mention the rules on your blog.
Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
Tag 6 fellow bloggers by linking them.
Leave a comment on each of the tagged bloggers blogs
letting them know they have been tagged.
Quirk #1: Laundry
I rarely put my clean laundry away. I fold it and stack it in the laundry basket and wear it straight out of the basket.
Quirk #2: Sleeping Habits
I move around a lot when I sleep (changing positions) but you'd never know it by looking at my bedclothes. I keep them flat and spread out on top of me--I don't understand how people can sleep with the sheets and blankets all bunched up and twisted around them. So uncomfortable.
Quirk #3: Sleeping attire
I hate sleeping in nightgowns--they get all twisted and bunched up around my legs. I also hate to sleep in long sleeves. It's gotta be long flannel or cotton pj pants with a short sleeved t-shirt.
Quirk #4: Bread
I always cut my toast or sandwiches diagonally. Always have and probably always will.
Quirk #5: Fingernails
I keep my fingernails all the same length. It bugs me so much to have them all different lengths. If one of them breaks, I'll either superglue it to keep it long or cut all the others short and let them all grow back out together.
Quirk #6: Dirty dishes
I hate when dishes are left full of water/food in the sink (ugh! Stinky!)--or when there are dirty dishes all over the counter. Dump them out and then stack 'em in the sink--or stack them on the counter, just don't leave them sprawled out all over the place!

Friday, August 29, 2008

So Tired of Being Alone

...theme song for my life right now...hurry up and get here already!

Friday, August 15, 2008

The Tricky Condition

So, we're having this competition at work called "Walk the Walk." It requires the participants to wear a pedometer during all waking hours. At the end of the contest the person who has taken the most steps wins. Simple, right? Well, a certain department in our company decided to actually read the instructions for the chinese-made pedometers and an hilarious letter was the result:

Wellness Team,

While we as a team have been dutifully wearing our pedometers in order to step in time, some questions have arisen as a result of a closer inspection of the “Operational Manual.”

This stepping meter can only count correctly under the flat plant.

As you may have noticed, there’s really not enough foliage around the building to stay under all the time in order to get correctly counted steps. While some of us have some houseplants around the office, carrying them around over our heads just to get pedometer points has resulted in some awkward and embarrassing situations. Additionally, mine may be broken because I think it occasionally counts steps when I’m not squarely positioned underneath any plants, flat or otherwise.

Under the following condition, the stepping meter can’t count correctly:
i. Moon walking, Wearing sandal
ii. When walking in the tricky condition
iii. Vibration without walking

Firstly (I like using first as an adverb), why the anti-moon walking discrimination? I, for one, don’t want to work for a company that discourages the act of moon walking as a legitimate form of intraoffice transportation. If the pedometer doesn’t work for people wearing sandals, then that’s just fine. We totally agree that there’s no need for hippies to get any more fit than absolutely necessary for them to live in their agri-commune and sleep in trees.

Second, as it relates to being in the tricky condition, does the pedometer rule out simply walking or is this expanded to include jogging, running, shuffling, cantering, loping, dance dance revolutioning, and any general ambulatory activity? We have emailed the Ministry of Silly Walks for clarification, but everyone knows they don’t spend much time in the office answering emails, so we could use some guidance on when one enters the tricky condition and whether sustained periods of trickiness are similarly excluded.

Finally, what are people doing with their pedometers when rule 2(iii) becomes necessary? Without jumping straight to the logical assumption that they are calling out construction street workers who specialize in jackhammering concrete, we feel that any other extracurricular, off-work-site personal activities that encourage cardiovascular vigor should have a place in any corporate wellness program.

The stepping meter can be reset by pressing “Reset” button.

Can we please get more clear instructions on the reset process instead of all the cryptic tech-speak? We’re accountants, not engineers, dag-na-bit.

Who knew accountants could be SO dang funny?